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Warning........The next pandemic!

Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 10:28 am
by the navigator
I went to a dinner party last night, where I and other guests enjoyed copious amounts of alcohol.

I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, sore eyes, etc.

From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu.

This debilitating condition is very serious - and it appears this is not an isolated case.

Reports are flooding in from all around the country of others diagnosed with Wine Flu. To anyone that starts to exhibit the afore mentioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down.

However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately hire a DVD and take some Nurofen. Nurofen seems to be the only drug available that has been proven to help combat this unusual type of flu. Others are reporting that pastry and chocolate can also help in some cases.

If not, then further application of the original liquid, in similar quantities to the original dose, has been shown to do the trick.

Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening and, if treated early, can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period.
Cheers!

NOTE..........If you find you are complaining a lot, it may be that it has mutated into Whine Flu. This is particularly common in men and can quickly spread to their partners where the symptoms are detected as a serious case of eye-rolling.

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 12:23 pm
by Jmc
Does Phil contract this regularly :D

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 2:04 pm
by Sausage
Jmc wrote:Does Phil contract this regularly :D
that's when he get banished to the man cave :batman (the shed) :drunk :drunk :drunk

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 8:05 pm
by Phil
What a reputation to have to live up to ========== :mrgreen:
I'm a hoarder not a drinker ----- :roll: :roll:
See you at Christmas for a glass or two - :cheers :cheers :cheers

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Posted: Wed Nov 11, 2009 9:22 pm
by dario
nothing to say here but
Image

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Posted: Fri Nov 13, 2009 12:02 am
by Jmc
Phil wrote:What a reputation to have to live up to ========== :mrgreen:
I'm a hoarder not a drinker ----- :roll: :roll:
See you at Christmas for a glass or two - :cheers :cheers :cheers
or 4 or 5 :d