Warning........The next pandemic!

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the navigator
Posts: 42
Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2009 9:43 am
Location: Midlands

Warning........The next pandemic!

Post by the navigator »

I went to a dinner party last night, where I and other guests enjoyed copious amounts of alcohol.

I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea, chills, sore eyes, etc.

From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling Wine Flu.

This debilitating condition is very serious - and it appears this is not an isolated case.

Reports are flooding in from all around the country of others diagnosed with Wine Flu. To anyone that starts to exhibit the afore mentioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down.

However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately hire a DVD and take some Nurofen. Nurofen seems to be the only drug available that has been proven to help combat this unusual type of flu. Others are reporting that pastry and chocolate can also help in some cases.

If not, then further application of the original liquid, in similar quantities to the original dose, has been shown to do the trick.

Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening and, if treated early, can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period.
Cheers!

NOTE..........If you find you are complaining a lot, it may be that it has mutated into Whine Flu. This is particularly common in men and can quickly spread to their partners where the symptoms are detected as a serious case of eye-rolling.
Jmc
Posts: 97
Joined: Sun Nov 01, 2009 10:02 pm
Location: Staffordshire, UK

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Post by Jmc »

Does Phil contract this regularly :D
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Sausage
Posts: 40
Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2009 9:50 am

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Post by Sausage »

Jmc wrote:Does Phil contract this regularly :D
that's when he get banished to the man cave :batman (the shed) :drunk :drunk :drunk
Last edited by Sausage on Wed Nov 11, 2009 8:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Phil
Posts: 169
Joined: Fri Nov 06, 2009 9:08 pm

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Post by Phil »

What a reputation to have to live up to ========== :mrgreen:
I'm a hoarder not a drinker ----- :roll: :roll:
See you at Christmas for a glass or two - :cheers :cheers :cheers
dario
Posts: 206
Joined: Sun Nov 01, 2009 10:13 pm
Location: Bedford
Contact:

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Post by dario »

nothing to say here but
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Jmc
Posts: 97
Joined: Sun Nov 01, 2009 10:02 pm
Location: Staffordshire, UK

Re: Warning........The next pandemic!

Post by Jmc »

Phil wrote:What a reputation to have to live up to ========== :mrgreen:
I'm a hoarder not a drinker ----- :roll: :roll:
See you at Christmas for a glass or two - :cheers :cheers :cheers
or 4 or 5 :d
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